This coming week marks a milestone of sorts. On Monday, I will be participating in a Press Conference in Hollywood ... designed to promote me and my art form ... my participation in 2013 Fashion Week San Diego. This Press Conference serves to introduce Who I Am and What I Do to the rest of the world.
I am excited ... and scared ... all at the same time.
So many "what ifs..." are coming to the surface.
What if ... I am late for the conference?
What if ... I say the wrong thing?
What if ... I drop my drink/food/purse/etc.?
What if ... not one person likes what I make?
What if ... no one likes me?
The last one is kinda a biggie to me. I spent many of my formative years fighting against a parent telling me that I would never be "good enough". Impressionable teen years railing against classmates that bullied or ridiculed me because I was too smart or too pretty or too quiet or too whatever happened to be their particular pet peeve at that moment.
Over the last 10 years, I've worked tirelessly to face and remove those fears. I've brought those concerns to the forefront of my life ... letting those who participated in my growth know that the words spoken in the past no longer have an affect on my present or on my future.
I love me ... who I've become ... and the path that I am creating for my future.
I love my life, the profession that I've chosen to invest my heart and soul into, and all of the decisions that I've made along the way to get me to where I am right now.
And I suppose ... in the bigger picture ... it doesn't really matter what other people think ... so long as I have put my best foot forward and put everything that I Am into the Dream that I have chosen to pursue.
I am reminded of words spoken by Darryl Anka:
"circumstances do not matter ... state of be-ing, matters".
I know this ... to my very core. But sometimes ... I forget.
Guess it's time to dig it out, dust it off, and put it into practice.
Will let y'all know how it turns out.
xoxoxo
